I am so excited it is almost December! I cannot believe I am two weeks away from being done with my first semester of college..it flew by!! I am definitely ready to be home for a few weeks and relax but before I can do that I have 2 exams and 4 finals that stand between me and HOME! :)
There has been a lot happening in the past few weeks including lots of big decisions! As the semester has been coming to an end, it came time to get advised and registered for the Spring semester. Coming into Baylor I was a Mathematics/Biology major on the Pre-Med track. I had all these aspirations of finishing my pre-requisites, going to med school or physician assistant's school and becoming a doctor of some sort. So last month I spent most of my time at career counseling and advising appointments but things just weren't falling into place. I was wrestling with God because I felt as though I was running out of time and more importantly I was running out of options.
God is SO faithful. I continued to pray for discernment, asking Him to guide my steps because the decisions were just getting harder. And now with God's guidance and reassurance, I have changed my major to Nursing!! I couldn't be any more excited! This is a big change for me because all along I have ruled out nursing as an option. I just didn't think it was for me..but I have quickly realized.. My plans are not always God's plans. I am one that likes to have control over situations and be in charge..this is not normally the role of a nurse. Not only will I not be in charge in my profession but I am reminded that God is in charge. It has been a humbling process because I am learning that God's plans are much greater than mine and life isn't always going to flow according to my plans. This is a really scary thought for someone like me who is a planner. I am getting more and more excited each day as God continues to open doors and lead me in the right direction!
So as for the new plan.. I am officially a Nursing major! I will finish my pre-requisites for nursing school in the next year and a half. Next November I will apply for the Louise Herrington School of Nursing (which Baylor has a 96% acceptance rate.) And then the Fall semester of my junior year I will move to Dallas for two years to go to nursing school. I am really excited because this allows me to jump right into clinicals a lot sooner and begin working at the hospital. I am anxious to see how God is going to use me in this field. I still have many questions but I do know that I am going in the right direction. Considering the fact that one day I want to be able to travel, get married and have children, I believe that nursing will be ideal for me!
I am so thankful that God is sovereign and that He knows exactly what I need. It is a good thing that my plans aren't His plans and my timing isn't His timing. I am learning to trust in Him and also what it means to believe that He will provide. Even in the midst of chaos and confusion, God has proved to be faithful. Today, I am doing my best to praise Him wherever He has me in life..even if I don't understand.
Be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. This is the way God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Thanks for your support, encouragement and prayers as I make big decisions about my future!
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
The last place I put God: a box.
I want to share with you an excerpt of a book I am slowly but surely reading. It is called Praise Habit: Finding God in Sushi & Sunsets by David Crowder. It is kind of long but totally worth reading.
I used to think I knew where to find God. He seemed to always be where I put Him last.
He was in Sunday school every Sunday morning. He was in "big church" right after. He was there most Sunday nights, too. He was around out dinner table when my father read from the blue Bible-story books. He was there when I prayed before meals. He was there most times I prayed elsewhere, too. He was there during my quiet times. He was at church on Wednesday nights. He was really there at church camp in the summer. He loved church camp. I think He just liked summers better in general. Once school started back, the moments with Him were farther spaced, it seems. I enjoyed finding Him. It felt like things were right. Even if they weren't, it felt okay. I wanted more moments with Him. I heard there was a Bible study on Monday nights, so I went, and sure enough-He was there. I had an accountability group and we met on Tuesdays, and sure enough-He was there, too. I heard about another Bible study that met on Thursdays, so I went, and wouldn't you know it, there He was. He began showing up in the songs we sang around 1983. It was called contemporary worship. It was great. He was always in these songs, so I would sing them whenever I wanted to find Him, and sure enough-there He'd be. By the time I got to college, I thought I had it all sorted out with everything in its place. Then tragedy came.
If I could have written this myself, I would have.This paragraph speaks volumes to me and often times I find myself thinking about it more and more each day.
August: I put God in a box. An actual cardboard box, along with all my other junk I was bringing to college. Pillows, bedding, pictures, clothes, books I anticipated to read, rugs, laptop, shoes, towels, camera. Everything I thought I needed until I visited home again. Everything I thought I needed to survive in my new town. Everything that was comforting to me. God was in a box too, somewhere. My Bible was in there among the books, devotionals and bible studies I had packed. What's wrong with this picture? I didn't really know where God was. I had packed Him up and was going to "unpack" Him when I needed Him. I wasn't really having a relationship with this God that I had learned about in high school. So, I came to college..and from the very beginning it has been an emotional roller coaster from one day to the next. My parents dropped me off, and I cried. And I cried some more. I needed God..but He was no where to be found. He was still in the box that I packed Him in back in mid-August. This was my "then tragedy came" moment.
Tragedy always comes. If it hasn't come for you, it will. Not the losing-your-homework kind or the having-to-flush-your-goldfish kind, but the kind that leaves you stripped. The kind that tears from you all ideas about living you once believed untearable. Mine came my junior year of college, and it came in a phone call. It was my mom. She said " David, something very terrible has happened." The words that followed were bombs. As they came hurtling toward me through miles of telephone wire, my muscles turned liquid, and when she finished, I was left wilted on the floor, and God was not there. At least I could no longer find Him. And I had no idea where to begin looking again. The places I used to frequent, I no longer trusted. In seven minutes everything I had thought about everything was dramatically different.
Well, I felt stripped, and I still do in a way. But God has stripped me of everything to get my attention. I use to look for him and find him in the youth ministry at Crossroads, in Shape on Sunday mornings and small groups Sunday nights, in my 8th grade girls small group I led, in my group of Godly friends, in Brittany Bethel, and in Scott Windham our youth pastor. And He was always there, He always showed up. Then tragedy came, maybe not through a phone call but it came, hard and fast. I felt empty, here I was in a new town with new people, new churches, a new place to sleep. Everything was new and I could no longer find God in the comforting places that I once knew or where I last left him..usually in the chairs of the auditorium at my church. What I had once thought was a relationship with God was actually just a convenient acquaintance relationship. I feel stripped and broken but God is breaking me down to my core. He has gotten my attention in the past few months and I am thankful for that. Although it has come through suffering, I have realized that God is not where I put Him last or where I thought He was. He is bigger than that, MUCH bigger than that. I am still learning what it takes to be in a relationship with Him and what it means to praise Him. He has taken my world and flipped it upside down (a few times) but I am learning what it means to follow Him wholeheartedly with everything inside of me. Where did you last put God? Have you looked for Him recently? When are you going to allow Him to start using you instead of only taking Him out of the box when you need Him?
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.
Psalm 37:7
I used to think I knew where to find God. He seemed to always be where I put Him last.
He was in Sunday school every Sunday morning. He was in "big church" right after. He was there most Sunday nights, too. He was around out dinner table when my father read from the blue Bible-story books. He was there when I prayed before meals. He was there most times I prayed elsewhere, too. He was there during my quiet times. He was at church on Wednesday nights. He was really there at church camp in the summer. He loved church camp. I think He just liked summers better in general. Once school started back, the moments with Him were farther spaced, it seems. I enjoyed finding Him. It felt like things were right. Even if they weren't, it felt okay. I wanted more moments with Him. I heard there was a Bible study on Monday nights, so I went, and sure enough-He was there. I had an accountability group and we met on Tuesdays, and sure enough-He was there, too. I heard about another Bible study that met on Thursdays, so I went, and wouldn't you know it, there He was. He began showing up in the songs we sang around 1983. It was called contemporary worship. It was great. He was always in these songs, so I would sing them whenever I wanted to find Him, and sure enough-there He'd be. By the time I got to college, I thought I had it all sorted out with everything in its place. Then tragedy came.
If I could have written this myself, I would have.This paragraph speaks volumes to me and often times I find myself thinking about it more and more each day.
August: I put God in a box. An actual cardboard box, along with all my other junk I was bringing to college. Pillows, bedding, pictures, clothes, books I anticipated to read, rugs, laptop, shoes, towels, camera. Everything I thought I needed until I visited home again. Everything I thought I needed to survive in my new town. Everything that was comforting to me. God was in a box too, somewhere. My Bible was in there among the books, devotionals and bible studies I had packed. What's wrong with this picture? I didn't really know where God was. I had packed Him up and was going to "unpack" Him when I needed Him. I wasn't really having a relationship with this God that I had learned about in high school. So, I came to college..and from the very beginning it has been an emotional roller coaster from one day to the next. My parents dropped me off, and I cried. And I cried some more. I needed God..but He was no where to be found. He was still in the box that I packed Him in back in mid-August. This was my "then tragedy came" moment.
Tragedy always comes. If it hasn't come for you, it will. Not the losing-your-homework kind or the having-to-flush-your-goldfish kind, but the kind that leaves you stripped. The kind that tears from you all ideas about living you once believed untearable. Mine came my junior year of college, and it came in a phone call. It was my mom. She said " David, something very terrible has happened." The words that followed were bombs. As they came hurtling toward me through miles of telephone wire, my muscles turned liquid, and when she finished, I was left wilted on the floor, and God was not there. At least I could no longer find Him. And I had no idea where to begin looking again. The places I used to frequent, I no longer trusted. In seven minutes everything I had thought about everything was dramatically different.
Well, I felt stripped, and I still do in a way. But God has stripped me of everything to get my attention. I use to look for him and find him in the youth ministry at Crossroads, in Shape on Sunday mornings and small groups Sunday nights, in my 8th grade girls small group I led, in my group of Godly friends, in Brittany Bethel, and in Scott Windham our youth pastor. And He was always there, He always showed up. Then tragedy came, maybe not through a phone call but it came, hard and fast. I felt empty, here I was in a new town with new people, new churches, a new place to sleep. Everything was new and I could no longer find God in the comforting places that I once knew or where I last left him..usually in the chairs of the auditorium at my church. What I had once thought was a relationship with God was actually just a convenient acquaintance relationship. I feel stripped and broken but God is breaking me down to my core. He has gotten my attention in the past few months and I am thankful for that. Although it has come through suffering, I have realized that God is not where I put Him last or where I thought He was. He is bigger than that, MUCH bigger than that. I am still learning what it takes to be in a relationship with Him and what it means to praise Him. He has taken my world and flipped it upside down (a few times) but I am learning what it means to follow Him wholeheartedly with everything inside of me. Where did you last put God? Have you looked for Him recently? When are you going to allow Him to start using you instead of only taking Him out of the box when you need Him?
Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.
Psalm 37:7
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
New to this whole blogging idea!
I am new to blogging..so be patient, it may take me a while to get started! But for now, thank you for taking the time to listen to my spill. I have created this blog for several reasons, mainly because I have had so many people encourage me to do it because it has helped them tremendously. I also wanted to do it because I know college will be a time in my life that I will want to look back on. It is a way for others to see what is going on in my crazy world and how God is working in my life personally. Feel free to leave comments or encouraging words or just let me know you stopped by to read! I am excited, more than anything, to share my thoughts with those around me.
Lately my heart has been so heavy and my mind is constantly racing. I have so many things I want to say and I don't even know where to begin. I feel as though I might just throw up a bunch of thoughts. Today's blog may be short but don't worry, there is more to come..
First off, the title of my blog is "Your Present Trial Will Be Your Future Ministry." Clever, huh?! Well as much as I would like to take credit for it, I can't. I was listening to Afshin Ziafat's podcast and his words jumped out at me. I can feel the presence of God in my life right now more than I ever have. And with His presence have come trials..many trials. I remind myself that God is going to use those trials for something good and they won't go to waste. I believe that God has me right where He wants me to be, whether in suffering or not. I pray that the trials will only pass after He has prepared my heart for what is to come.
This is just a few of my thoughts today but I will post again this week so be looking for it! Thanks for listening :)
Lately my heart has been so heavy and my mind is constantly racing. I have so many things I want to say and I don't even know where to begin. I feel as though I might just throw up a bunch of thoughts. Today's blog may be short but don't worry, there is more to come..
First off, the title of my blog is "Your Present Trial Will Be Your Future Ministry." Clever, huh?! Well as much as I would like to take credit for it, I can't. I was listening to Afshin Ziafat's podcast and his words jumped out at me. I can feel the presence of God in my life right now more than I ever have. And with His presence have come trials..many trials. I remind myself that God is going to use those trials for something good and they won't go to waste. I believe that God has me right where He wants me to be, whether in suffering or not. I pray that the trials will only pass after He has prepared my heart for what is to come.
This is just a few of my thoughts today but I will post again this week so be looking for it! Thanks for listening :)
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